Anniversary

Our Anniversary was April 22nd. We have now been married for 7 years. Since Christmas I had been stashing money every Thursday night to save for our anniversary pictures, I had collected $72.00. Around midnight, which I had been waiting for, I quickly turned to him and wished him a happy anniversary and gave him a card. Bout an hour later he gave me card also. At 2 A.M I took my bath and he slid another card under the bathroom door. ( I thought it was the cats playing with paper at first). AT 3 A.M we finally went to bed consummating our anniversary. In the morning I placed his first gift, a 8mb memory card for the playstation 2, on top of the console. Now I just had to see how long it would take him to notice it. We had spent the largest part of the day sitting in front of our computers waiting for 4pm to roll around so we could leave and get our pictures done. I attempted to deck myself out having it all planned out down to the minute but Jerry decided he wanted to eat before the pictures so... I got ready early. But of course, like Jerry, he changed his mind. So after spiffing up we sit back down at the computers for 2 more hours. As we are grabbing our stuff to leave he notices the memory card. He had ruined his original anniversary gift. I had bought him Burnout 2 for the playstation 2 on Tuesday and he had bought it on Saturday. Walking out the door I quickly ran back inside to place his second gift on yet again the console. I had bought him a wireless controller for the playstation 2. Finally we left and headed to one of my co-workers studios. Making sure all cell phones were left at home cause his friends like to call every half hour. He had already been on the phone most of the morning as it was.
As we enter the parking lot he immediately spots a starbucks and wants to go there. I had to turn the wheel away from it so we would make it on time. Having a quick cigarette we walk in to see she is shooting someone else. I help her out a bit to make it go faster. Reapplying my makeup and adjusting my hair we are finally ready for our turn. After 7 poses, choosing who gets what size, I pulled out my money and I get almost all the bill payed for. Would of had it all but Jerry decided he wanted a $75.00 item and a $13.00 item attached to the bill. The $13.00 item was a cd with all our pictures on it. Here are three of them.


Anniversary2005 


Jerry 2005 


Roxanne 2005 

So now we owe about 32 bucks more. Upon leaving he b-lines it to starbucks, stopping along the way to purchase a game from gamestop. Getting our drinks we leave and made our way to dinner. Of course Jerry has other plans so he stops at his grandmothers house. I later found out why he wanted to stop their. Spending about 30 minutes with her we make our way to the Mexican restaurant he chose. Standing in line at a Mexican buffet one of his friends magically appears in line behind us. His friend Dave that lives about 3 hours north of us had come to dinner. He would only be in town for 2 1/2 days. He had invited him to dinner. Needless to say I was pissed off. During dinner I give him another card, which I had put into his medical bag when he was driving. After dinner he fought me about his friend. Saying that he drove all this way and had only spent 45 minutes with us. OH and that he was only here for a short time and that he only gets to see him once every 3 months. He did not seem to understand that this was our day to be together. He could of spent the next day with him but that would have interfered with his hunting trip he had planned with his friends. I surrendered on the argument. I was not going to ruin our anniversary.
After dinner we headed to the movies to watch, "The Amityville Horror". I gave him his last gift, or I should say card, that described us very well. I had expected his friend or another one to be their for the movies too. Ending late in the evening we eventually headed home. At the house I asked him to get the piece of paper next to the playstation 2 and put it in my purse. There he finds the final end to his gifts. To end the night we consummated our anniversary one last time.

So that was our Anniversary. Hope your like the pictures and story.

Where are my dreams?

There are very few things in life that I dream about having. I am not one of those greedy people that want everything they see. I want what matters. I have the typical girls dream to have a horse. But my biggest dream is to have a child. Preferably a little girl. Have had the name picked out since I was 16, well the first name at least. IF I ever had a daughter I would call her Angelina Jeannita. The name Angelina off my best friend and Jeannita off my mother and my husbands grandmother. I originally had it with 2 middle names but when I would say the whole name the two middles ones slammed together and formed one word so I just smooshed them together.

I don't know what makes me want to have a child so bad but all I know is that I would make an awesome mother. I am not abusive and have all kinds of plans once it is born. I would take a boy if and when I ever do get pregnant and still use a lot the plans on him. Jerry has already been told he can't name it from anyone in Guns N Roses. Though slash is such an awesome name.

I had done the fertility thing about 2 years ago but just as we were getting to the part where they take his swimmer and inject it into my egg, Jerry backed out and went off on expenses. So we stopped trying to get help to make my dream come true. It also doesn't help that my husband has very ,very few swimmers and that I do not produce enough eggs. I still try quite hard remembering all the little things that the doctor had me doing. It is still not working. Like Jeff Foxworthy says "I am trying a lot harder than he is". I try every time we make love.

I don't know what I did to make god mad me but it is not fair. He will give these 15 year olds kids, kids. Give families their 8th kid. Even let abusers of sex, drugs, alcohol, and bad living conditions a child. But not me no, I am not worthy. I work, I don't do drugs, I rarely drink, and I have compassion and love for kids. So what is the reason I can't have one. I would try to adopt but I know the state would find my house unsafe due to the rattlesnakes (my husband won't give those up), and that we do not make enough to support the child. Though most families nowadays live off of the state and foodstamps. I was told quite a few times that if I do adopt I will most likely get pregnant. WOO HOO come on lets adopt. My mothers form of birth control was telling all guys that I was the next in line for triplet girls. When she stopped telling them that is when I started having sex. But not because of her birth control it was because I was not ready. I was 17 I think when I finally had sex.

Over the years I have kept stuffed animals, books, movies, and made plans for the child I would like to finally have. With the luck that I have I feel that it will never happen, because I don't get what I want, everyone else does. I will continue to hold, love and play with everyone else's kids though. Kinda works out being a photographer. But that is all I will ever be able to do.

My dream is to have a child that is the my biggest dream, prayer, and hope. I guess you can't always have what you want in life. Especially not me. There are only so many stars you can wish upon, prayers you can have and coins you can toss before the dream fades away.

Friends

What are friends? Does anyone really know? I mean what makes a friend a friend. How does one become a friend? It is by talking to someone. If so I got shitloads of friends all over the world. Is it by smiling? Geeze I hope not cause then I am the most popular person in the world. I have often thought about this question 'What makes a friend a friend"?

Back before 1997 I had loads of friends. We hung out, talked on the phone, shared secrets, hid out at each other places, we even got into trouble quite a few times. But now I realize they weren't really friends they were loafers and moochers. Or were just using me to make someone else jealous. I can not seriously sit here and think of anyone who did anything for me unless it benefited them. Well cept for a choice few and that was still a small amount. The girls I hung out with never invited me to go and do things with them, the guys just wanted to make out. They found out I was not that easy. After highschool it was people who needed a place to go or were looking
for a party. Which I supplied nightly. Come in smoke out, sleep over, go home. See ya
tomorrow. Now it is 2005 and I still don't have any friends. I don't get why either. I am really friendly and always willing to lend a hand to anyone that will take it. My should and ear get more of a workout than my legs do and I pace a lot at work. But that is only at work. I don't even get phone calls with people wanting to chat. Of course I am not a phone person. I prefer face to face than voice to voice. You can't hug someone with a word. *HUG* this don't count.

Now my husband he has LOTS of friends. A lot of them associate with me too but they would never invite me to go do something with them or talk on the phone with me for hours. Jerrys friends call him all the time and do things with him all the time. Invite him to hunting, movies, dinner, to their houses and to dinner. Some of his friends are not really inviting me but since I am the wife and he loves me they have no choice. I don't restrict him to the house. My only request is that he don't go drinking especially where there are other females, and that he checks in with me every 3-4 hours so I know he is ok. No reason making him miserable being trapped at home all the time. About 70% of his friends are kewl the other 30% I would swear are pitty cases and have very serious mental problems. Yeah I am talking about you matt Jim and john....... JOKING... GEEZE. Actually I like most of his friends there are just 3-4 that I could keep on slapping and never feel bad about it. Only one of them knows I feel this way as I have pointed it out to him in person. This I am NOT
joking about. Here lemme tell you about his friends. Wait lemme get mine out of the way then we will work on his. He has a HUGE list.

John/Simba - I met him in 1992, in high school. He puppy dogged me for bout a year before I finally decided to go out with him. I was new to civilian life and was adjusting to the new way of life and totally different types of people. Besides he had all the other girls drooling over him so it was not like he was desperate for love. Once we finally went out it was off and on for 2 years, til we finally decided to just be friends. He still had all the girls wanting him and We both still had feelings towards one another but nothing was ever acted on. Thought of but never acted on. Though he had moved to Oklahoma for 3 years and came out of the closet we were still the closest of friends and still are. He now lives south of Tucson but we talk once a week. My husband is kewl with it cause he is gay I think if he was bi or into chicks only, I would never be permitted to see him. We all know how guys are. Anyways John is the greatest person I ever met and though he annoys the crap out
of me I always feel better when I know he is ok. He is totally into Disney characters, and has drawn 4 murals of every single Disney character up to a certain date. I begged for one these since 1993. I finally got mine a few months ago, it is hanging on my ceiling.

Angel - She and I have been friends since 1989. I met her in Japan when my father was on tour there. Our friendship began at a school bus stop off-base. She has 2 sisters and 3 brothers. Our friendship was based all around horses and our perkiness. We were in the same grade but never had a class together, but we had plans for the future. Then she moved which is where I lost her. I had moved back to the U.S. and we had planned to spend the summer together. We never talked again. It was creepy just how she vanished. After searching on the internet and recruiting all my internet pals I finally found her on classmates.com. Actually I found her sister. When we started socializing again I learned that she had a baby and she was married. It was a definite reverse from my life. Yeah I was married too but I could never have a child. (That is a whole separate blog right there). WE have tried to make plans to see each other again but the work force won't permit it. At least we get to
talk.

I have people I used to work with that I have gone out with a few times but it has been awhile now it is just phone tag and unwilling. These people are Debi, Kate, Cindy and Mark. I met all of them at ghettospectrum. I don't really do much with them anymore barely even talk anywhere else. They have kids and jobs too that keep them from doing anything. Doesn't help they have the weekends off and I don't. The calls are getting fewer and farther between soon to be non existent.

Then I have the people I talk to online.... Rob, Peet, Guike, and Giant. Rob is my closest pal though he has vanished off the face of the earth. Peet is into dragons and I swear works to much. Guike is an alternate father online. He is kewl and loves his son. Giant sends me the coolest pictures. We used to be in a clan together online but we both left because the owners of the channels were rude and starting to charge.

Now there are Jerrys friends. I am only going to mention a few as I WILL hurt a few feelings if they ever read this. We will start off with the fools.

Matt- They have been friends for a LONG time. He can be goofy but has grown up a lot. I watch videos of jerryfars childhood and he is in it. Just recently he got married and Jerry was his best man. I was not asked to but I was a behind the scenes camera woman. I took some pictures that nobody else even thought of taking. His wife Michelle is really kewl and fun. They both like to drink and do karaoke. We would do it together more often if they didn't live out in the boonies. Michelle has 2 kids from a previous marriage and well Matt he is a kid himself. They are probably Jerrys' most real friends he has.

Brandon/Brent- They are twins that live north of us. Unmarried. They have also known Jerry as long as Matt. They all grew up together. At times they can be a pain in the butt, but hey what friend ain't. Occasional they come down for a baseball game or a concert and they will all hang out. We attempt to go to them but always find it is hard to spend quality time with friends in another town. Especially when we are a one car family and I work every weekend.

John L - Unmarried, but might as well be. He is a really stiff person but knows how to smile when he has to. I would be the same way if I was a producer. He is not a huge success but he will be one day. Right now he is trying to distribute his movie 420 http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0380160/ . Low budget but interesting. He has done some other movies like documentaries and shorts. But amongst the fools they will always remember their movies they made growing up. Exceptionally b rated but some were actually good. He has come a long way since then.

Now for the non Fools.

Jeff - He is a family friend and possible father of Jerrys youngest sister. He and the other possible father that she lives with now refuse to do a bloodtest to find out who the real father is so they just leave it alone. He now lives in California now but used to live with us, 3 years to be precise. He would still be living with us but he moved out 2 years ago because Jerrys grandmother was supposed to come and live with us but also because we had not lived alone since we go married and it had been 5 years He is into computers, Single, and has a job. Single still too. We still talk to him, but our hours don't work out so it ends up being emailing to get information across. He still visits us once a year. Usually around Thanksgiving.

Jim - One of Jerrys co-workers. He is a character. Real fun loving and an x-military shit kicker. He likes to sing but he won't do karaoke. More than happy to make an ass out of himself in front of people he knows though. He is married and has a totally brilliant daughter and exceptionally cute. We have known him for a couple years. He is lives out in B.F.E also so not much for hanging out. Jerry does stuff with him on the weekends, I see him but maybe once a month.

Ceazar - He is also a co-worker. Has a girlfriend who has a son. He loves that kid, but it also helps that he is a kid too. He is also into computers, console games, and everyone once in awhile Jerry takes him out on his little snake trips. But of course Jerry has taken almost everyone on his snake trips. Even Simba my friend. Anyways Ceazar has been friends with Jerry for quite awhile. They used to work with one another at another job. Jerry enjoyed that he worked for a mexican restaurant between the two jobs, its his favorite food place.

Dave - Yet another co-worker well x-coworker that lives a few hours north of here. He is a diabetic like Jerry and is as bad into computer as he is.

Then there are his herping pals.... TO MANY TO GO THROUGH EACH ONE. But I will state names and little pieces of info.

Doug and Robert - Brothers who are married, Doug just recently. They work for the walmart lube shop.

Joe - Married with 3 kids and is a kid doctor.

Richard - Really weird and has a girlfriend. Also has a job that gives him ALOT of days off but pays exceptionally well.

Then we all have the friends that live in another state and contact us but maybe 3 times a year.

Well I know he has ALOT more friends than that but it is our anniversary and all I can think of is getting laid and celebrating surviving him for 7 years.

Your Final words (Caution for shedding tears)

When leaving for work, school, or just going to bed make sure to tell your significant other or family member that you love them or make amends with the friends you give a damn about. They could be your final words.

Don't make your last words be something you will regret. Even if in a bad mood speak your love. Even if it has to be in sign language.

Many years ago my best friend, the one who introduced Jerry and I, and her daughter, were killed in a house fire. My last words to her were unpleasant. After she passed away I regretted never telling her I was sorry.
Ever since I have always said what was important when I was leaving or going to sleep. Many times I have gone to bed mad at Jerry. I have still always said it but he was always asleep, so he don't hear me. Though he don't say it to loud I can hear a mumbled I love you when he is trying to fall asleep on the other nights. I have even said I love you as I drive away in tears ticked off at him.

When your leaving for work, leaving for school, running to the store, going to a friends house or whatever always remember to say I LOVE YOU. It could be your last words.

Think about how it would feel if you left for work and the last thing you said to your wife was 'make sure you get those bills paid'. While she is out paying bills she gets seriously hurt or even worse killed.
Also think about running to the store to get the paper from the store and you get into a car accident. Your last words 'your going to be late get to school'.
Or for the older couples and couples where one has a sickness that could make them pass away in their sleep. Your about to fall asleep and your last words are 'did you lock the doors'.

These are just a few instances you should acknowledge. SO... for now on make sure to tell your lover, friend, or kids you love them cause they may be your last words. Don't let this happen to you.
http://www.youth2000ny.com/Help/crying%20baby.gif

I learned somehow

Though I am 28 years old, I am old school. I was brought up by both my mother and my father, who have just recently in the past few years started stepping into the new age. I was also brought up with 1 older sister and 3 older brothers. I was taught alot in my lifetime but not by the kind I had to sit down for I learned by experience.

I am the type of person who learns by actions and by doing. I was and still am a hard person to teach something because I just want to be hands on. My parents never really taught me anything. But boy howdy I learned alot by watching or by the hard way. These are the things I learned.

MOTHER: She taught me to always look after everyone else and worry about your own problems later. I also learned to always have the house clean, and the dinner on the table when the man comes home after working. To walk around with a smile 24-7 and never let anyone know you have anything wrong. Fall asleep in the oddest places and positions. A bath is not hot enough unless you come out looking like a lobster. Make the world happy. Be the strongest but have the softest spot.

FATHER: He taught me how to work my ass off. Smoke. (He smoked tobacco pipes I thought they smelled so good figured I would do it to). Spend money on something I like and everyone else thinks are childish. (Him HO scale trains.... MINE plastic horses.

BROTHERS: Always fight for what you believe in. That you can get away with alot if you know how to lie and flirt.(To bad for them the cops are mostly dudes). A girl can kick a guys butt if she is ticked off enough. Some very good dirty jokes. Hitchhiking is a long road but great exercise. The faster out of the house the more fun you can have. Liquor makes you stupid and can cause ALOT of financial and long term mistakes. The opposite sex is something temporary and there are always others around to do.

SISTER: No matter what size house you have you can always fit one more. Your kids grow up to fast. That I was an aunt at like 6 years old. With debt, stress, full house, foreclosure, and repos you can still have a happy marriage. Not all kids are sour apples some have sweet spots.

GRANDPARENTS: Always go to church. Give the ones you love most of all your attention make excuses to others. You can lightly lean on them only sometimes but they can sit on you daily. They are always right. If they have to travel long distances they would travel somewhere they like.

THE COPS: They will not use their signals to turn. They can run a red light if they don't feel like waiting in the line of traffic. To fill their quota they will pull you over if they are bored enough. Certain cops in certain parts of town are jerks. If you are a law abiding citizen you are more likely to get a ticket than the guy who tries to run you off the road hourly.

KIDS: Imagination is a wonderful thing. A smile can make the world smile too. A child can turn the head of almost every woman. Children are only naughty if spoiled rotten or not taken care of properly. An adult with the child still inside has a better connection with the actual child than the adult who let his child die years ago.

DRUGS and LIQUOR: Some people were definitely made stupid by the drugs and alcohol they consumed. I did alot of both. I smoked pot more than anything and I think I did not turn out that bad. I drank and smoked out every night after work. I am not an aggressive drunk but I do get 10x's more jealous. I am a natural jealous person. With the drugs I mainly used was to escape the world and go to sleep. Kept my migrains away too. I do still drink about twice a week. The drugs about every six months to a year. I only do a little as it messes me up real fast. Though I was toasted often I was still able to do my duties and take care of family. Never got screwed financially or wrecked my vehicles. Unlike other people. I learned that I had a tolerance and never experienced substance abuse or hangovers. I also learned that certain people are damn funny when they are out of their heads. I still crave but I can do without. I would rather be high on life.

What a woman wants

If you don't want your woman to have a mental break down on you or go look for interests elsewhere I would advise you take heed to these words.

I am a romantic. I give all before I receive. My world revolves around my husband and anyone who knows us knows that this is true. If were going out with friends we go out with his friends. Family get together? His family. His job and his interests come first always. This why he has everything and gets everything that he wants. No I can't buy everything all at once but I at least try to accommodate him somehow.

Anyways... if you have a woman who is lovey dovey be lovey back
Who cares what your boys think. If you don't want to be razzed about it don't do it in front of them.

If your woman is always cleaning and doing laundry. Take one of your days off and do it for her. NOT half assed either.

If she does something to you while being intimate, pretty sure she is wanting something similar also. Nibbling of the nipples, aggressive grabbing of the butt or tits. Wandering fingers. Don't take to much attention away from the pleasure you are offering her but offer some so you can read the signs.

RETURN THE FAVOR
You don't have to do it all the time but at least once a month love her and do for her as she does for you.

IDEAS:

While at the store picking something up for dinner or whatever buy one of those stupid fake roses or even better a real one. OR something that she likes to drink or snack on.

When sitting at home and she is to come home soon, cook dinner. NO NOT TAKE OUT! Actually make dinner.

Make an effort to clean the house so that it is noticeable. This includes the dishes and taking out the trash.

Surprise her at work. Have something delivered or stop buy to take her out to lunch. Even if it is to Subway. Even bringing her something is appreciated.

Rub her feet or give her a massage while you relax with one another.

Spend a day doing the things she loves.

TIPS:

Tell her you love her. Text message it to her if you have to. Make a 3 second phone call. Leave it on a note somewhere you know she will look. Leave a voicemail. Something just let her know. It will make her all mushy.

Don't ask her what she wants for Christmas or her birthday. Trust me she has been throwing out hints, you just don't listen.

Don't ask her where she wants to go for dinner(You should know her favorite places). Or what she wants to see at the movies(You should also know the kinds of movies she is into).

Work by her side with chores, don't get on the computer or start watching TV.

Change your rituals. Instead of coming home and doing your regular nightly thing play some bored games instead or make love till you pass out.

Express interest in her hobbies like she does yours. Help her to get what she wants instead of always taking.



Women do a lot more than you see them do. Or care to pay attention to. This is my weekday ritual.

The alarm goes off at 7:15am. Jerry is supposed to get up so he can do his computer stuff first. Instead he resets the alarm for 7:30am. Then again for 7:45am. Sometimes he actually gets up. Usually when the alarm goes off at 8:00am I get up unless I need to take a shower then it is 7:45. When Jerry finally decides to get out of the bed he goes straight to the computer room.... boxers and all. I get dressed and do my hair. I leash the cats and go out for a smoke. I tell Jerry twice I am going so that he has time to come too. He rarely does. After the smoke I brush my teeth, and do my makeup. Now it is around 8:25am. Next I feed our two lizards some red leaf lettuce, turn off the turtles nightlight, and turn on the vine snakes light. Returning to the kitchen I make my husbands lunchbox/medical bag. Finishing that I grab my purse, his bag, and the phones and put them in the truck, putting my keys in the ignition. I come back in and tell Jerry we need to leave and sit down to check my email. It is now 8:45am. Jerry now gets up and gets dressed, combs his hair, and sets the house alarm. 9:00am we hop in the truck to leave for work. Every morning he stops at circle K, starbucks or sonic to get something for breakfast or to drink. Around 9:30am we arrive at his work and I get in so that I can leave for work. I have to be there at 10am. By the time I arrive it is 9:50am. Thank god I am the manager and I have knowone watching me.

At 7:00pm I get off work and drive back to his work to pick him up. I wait for awhile and he finally comes out. After having a smoke with his co-workers we leave. Somewhere around 9:00pm we are either just getting home or have been their for about 30 minutes. I immediately go into the kitchen and start preparing dinner. While it cooks I either do the dishes or I sit on the couch so that we can watch our prerecorded shows from the past week. Every 10 minutes getting up to check on dinner. Dinner finishes and I serve it to him in the living room so that we can continue watching tv. After dinner we have a smoke, and watch more shows. Around 11:00pm or 12:00pm we turn off the TV and have our last smoke. He goes to the computer room and I turn off the lights and set the house alarm. I turn off the 2 lizards lights, turn on the turtles lights and feed them. I check the cats food and water then turn off the vine snakes light. Checking to make sure the doors are locked I tell Jerry I am going to take a bath and will be out in 30 minutes. (My bathtime is my serenity moment I do not like being disturbed). Finishing with the bath I put my shorts and t-shirts on then set the alarm clocks. (We have 2). After making the bed I turn on the fan and lay down to read some hoping my husband will come to bed very soon. I yell for him and wait. Thirty minutes pass and I put the book away and pass out with the light on. Then the day repeats.

My days off consist of laundry every single time, and paying the bills, as I only get one day off. While doing laundry I take out the trash and do some spot cleaning. I would rather sleep in but I know that I have to get dinner thawed out, check on work, do laundry, and write my blog :). hehe When it is getting around time for him to get home I will start cooking dinner and doing dishes. By the time he arrives dinner is ready or very close to it, laundry is done just not put away, and the trash is picked up. He either jumps on his computer or sits on the couch till I call him to come and eat. His days off are awesome. He gets 2 in a row both on the weekend and he goes out with his friends to snake hunt. Leaving before or almost immediately after I leave for work. Saturdays I work an 11 hour shift, getting in at 9am. After work when he don't have the truck I go home and plop down on the couch to relax and rub my own feet. If he took the truck I either have to take a taxi or wait around till he shows up. If he is not home I will munch on sandwich or eat some crackers. Somewhere before midnight he comes home and we look at pictures, then my nightly ritual begins all over again. Alarm, bath.... blah blah blah. When he is home I come home and cook dinner and I just replay my weekday nightly schedule. Dinner, dishes, blah blah blah.

I see dumb people

I am sure that everyone thinks that their customers are the stupidest people they ever met, and I have heard of some really stupid people. But I get some on a daily basis that I just want to slap.
I am a photographer and 6 days a week I take pictures of kids mostly. I do pretty well with them. It is the adults that I get a little flustered with. Whether they are the parents or the subject. They are never happy and always want the million dollar smile. Which I have succeeded in AFTER I have kicked out the parent. Here are some for instances to keep you entertained.

Before every session I explain to the customer that we do not have the option to take five photos then let you pick and chose the one that is your favorite. The one you say yes to is the one that becomes the package and it is always the first picture we take, all pictures you say no to are deleted and we can not get them back. We get 5 tries to get it right. I also explain to them that is one package per family and it is only one pose with your choice of background. I also tell them that I do 6 additional poses these are mandotory and that I need to take them because of how the system is programmed. This is also how I make my money. Some get it but most...... well you'll see.

THE PARENTS: This lady came in last week. She had 2 boys and 1 girl. I explained to her the requirements. She argued the fact that Ollan Mills (k-mart) and Sears allow you to choose what you want. I returned the arguement that we were not them and that we held our own policies. After arguing for 15 minutes she gives in and we prepare for the shoot. Setting the kids on the table and getting them aligned I was ready to take pictures. The first shot and she wants the background changed. Second shot she wants her oldest son to be closer to his little sister. Third shot she decides she does not like ANY of it and wants them positioned different. After spending 5 minutes to reset the kids and calm them down we take the picture. Fourth shot she decides she like the way they were posed in the first shot. I explain to her that we only have one more shot left and if it is not right we need to reschedule. Putting the kids back into the first position we take our fifth shot. She don't like how they are smiling and wants another background. I am a nice guy so I go ahead and do it one more time. Still No. I tell her we can do no more and that we need to reschedule. She decides she wants to look at the last 6 pictures taken and choose from one of those.....*sigh* Again I need to explain. She was not happy that the pictures got deleted and decides that she don't want any of them and leaves.
Another customer the other day. A father brings in his 2 kids. He chose the pose and the background I just took the shot. He didn't like the kids smiles. Redo, same smiles, still dont like it. Third time same smiles. I rotate chairs and make them face the other direction, and we do a fourth. The same smiles again, which are perfect btw. Fifth shot again the exact same look but now both of his kids have their eyes pointing at the ceiling. He loves it and keeps it.
About a month ago I had a mother with 2 girls. The girls were models and needed some portfolios. The very first picture was the two of them together. I worked hard. Every single picture the mother changed their clothes and redid their hair. That is 7 changes. Took an hour and a half to do. Thank god I am a new studio and don't get a whole lot of business. After making every single picture the bomb and very proud of myself we go to the sales computer and she does not want anything but the package. Trust me I was pissed. And the finally. The father brought in his 2 kids, a boy and a girl. He was to start off rude. We finally got into position and I approached the little girl to get her smile. She screamed as loud as she could like I was killing her. The father looks up at me and says "She is scared of strangers". You know what tell the fucking photographer this shit BEFORE we start the pictures. This is information we need. He decided he would walk his daughter around and come back in 5 minutes he never returned. I could go on but I will stop and go to kids.

THE KIDS: I have taken ALOT of kids pictures. The ones that just make me exhausted are the ones that are not watched. I had 2 kids at a store I was working at about a month ago that kept turning off the power to my computers. While I was in the middle of a shoot.
One little boy 2 weeks ago was so high strung that alot of the pictures I took of him were off center cause he was always moving or trying to climb off the table. The parents just watched thinking I was going to catch him, entertain him, and get the million dollar smile. Only two came out decent.
One little girl last friday I was attempting to do a single pose on her. I would tell her to smile and she would open her mouth as wide as it would go and throw her head back. Really attracting. Her mom would tell that is not a smile and she would get this whimpering voice and say I don't know what my smile looks like. We showed her some smiles but she began to cry cause she didn't know what her smile was. So I showed her a picture of my sister in law and said smile like her. Finally we got something out of her.
Alot of the kids that I do especially the boys when trying to get them to look somewhere specific and smile they always laugh and move around then turn their eyes to either their parents or to the monitor just as I am about to click it. So they turn out looking demonic or like goofy.

STUFF THAT MAKES ME MAD: Parents who change their kids clothes more than twice and don't buy any of the additionals pictures. Getting mad at me cause I deleted a picture that was the best one out of the 5 we have tried, but they didn't like where one person was looking. Not understanding that the package picture can not be altered. Coming in late for an appointment and getting mad cause I took someone else that was there. I already gave them 10 minutes. Making a mess and not cleaning it up. Making me sit there forever to get the right picture and giving up and leaving. Yelling and threatening the kids, (yeah that will make them smile real big). Not satisfied with ANY of the pictures but everyone else thinks they are turning out perfect. Wanting a picture to look exactly like a picture that was taken a few months ago by a totally different person and company. Bringing in kids for pictures that are obviously sick. Making an appointment for ALOT of people then cancelling. Showing up 30 minutes before we close wanting to take pictures. Arriving while we are away and getting management because we are not their. YOU KNOW WE DESERVE BREAKS AND LUNCHES ALSO.

Anyways that is my blog for today. I wanted to do this daily but whew when you work, take people to work, and come home to cook and clean you dont have time to do a daily blog. So I will trying to get in when I can.

APRILS FOOLS

Decided That I would wait until tomorrow to actually start blogging. I will have a lot more to talk about then.

But since my darling husband is chit chatting on the phone with his friends I will give some insight on myself.


Roxanne 1995 

I am 28 years old. Born August 12th, 1976
Come from a family of 5 1 sister, and 3 brothers. I am the baby.
Born in the middle of the United States
I am an X Air Force brat ( and proud of it )
Currently living in Arizona
I have no kids, but been working on some for 5 years
Been married for 7 years as of April 22nd
I live in a house that I worked my ass off to get
Hobbies: Going the movies, going out to eat, horseback riding, spending time with my best friend Simba, collecting any and all R.L Stines and Little Golden Books, collecting plastic horses (bryers), collect mcfarlane figures, singing, cartoon porn, and hanging out with people.


Jerry 1998 

My husband Jerry is 31 and he has no kids from a previous relationship
He comes from a family of 6 he is the oldest 2 brothers and 3 sisters
He is a native Arizonian (not to many of those running around)
Hobbies: Reptile collecting, herping (road cruising for reptiles) hiking, spending money, going the movies, Mexican food, playing video games, downloading anything and everything till his hard drive starts smoking, talking on the phone, watching TV, singing, hanging out with his friends.

How it all began: November 1997, My friend Jenna calls me up late one night telling me about her boyfriends friend Jerry and how he wants to me meet me. Actually she was trying to get some alone time with her man but he was ALWAYS around so she showed him a picture of me, and he just had to get with me. I personally had just gotten out of a relationship that was really bad. I had been dating and living with, Robert James VanDemark from Pennsylvania, and about 6 months into the relationship he started cheating on me, calling me names, and abusing me. With the help of my friends I finally got away from him. Was 6 months single when Jenna decided to play love connection. Anyways.... He and I talked on the phone for 2 months. Every phone call consisted of him begging me to go out with him. He even had Jenna begging me. I kept refusing until finally to make him shut up I went out with him.
Our first date was at the beginning of January on a Monday. A good old fashioned double date. Jenna and her boyfriend and me and him. I decked myself out and waited for him to arrive. Finally after dark the doorbell rings. Jenna stood on my porch. Grabbing my bag we head out to this 2 door 1992 Chevy cavalier. She climbs into the backseat, where I see this really short and really skinny guy. Now jenna is not a skinny girl, so it was a bit of a fit. Next I climbed in. Looking over to introduce myself the first thought that went through my mind was 'no wonder nobody told me what he looked like'. HEHE big nose, big ears, ultra thin, looking like he was 16 years old, and had done ALOT of drugs. Now I am not the type of person who relies on looks to get me through life but this guy was not what I was expecting. He had a really nice begging voice.
We arrive at a bar 45 minutes later. I was not even close to being old enough. Getting out of the car I realized how tall Jerry was WOW he is freakin tall. We all walked in and found a table next to the karaoke dj. After a few minutes of chit chat the guys decided to play pool. Us gals just sat and chat. An hour or two passes and Jerry and I have not talked even gotten close to one another. I decide to use the restroom and Jenna follows. Checking my makeup (typical chick thing) Jenna confronts me. 'Your not interested in him are you" I looked at her and gave her the DUH look. After discussing that this was pointless we finally decide to just go home. Squeezing back into the car, Jenna leans forward and says that Jerry is going to drive her home first then he will take me home. I rolled my eyes. At her place we got out and talked for a few minutes. Jenna, knowing my track records with guys, begs me not to kiss him knowing full well that he will fallow me like a puppy, like other past relationships have. Trust me I didn't plan on it. Driving me home he puts in Weird Al Yankovich, one of my many favorite singers. That released the tension a bit. We both sang along with the CD.
Finally getting home well after 1am I sit in his car trying to figure out how to get out of the car. We talked for a few minutes and I thanked him for an interesting night. Next thing I know he is kissing me. Time stood still literally. I get out the car and make my way inside saying to myself. SHIT what have I done. I have fucked everything up. I close the door to my house and peek out the little window and still see him sitting there staring at my house. I said to myself 'go away, go away'. Finally he drives off and I run to grab the cordless phone to call Jenna. My first words to her are "I fucked up" Jenna new what I was talking about immediately and chewed me out for 5 minutes. When I finally got a word I explained to her that he started it. I guess that was no excuse. Hanging up the phone I went to my room to think about the night. Two thirty in the morning arrives and he is calling me. My mother is screaming about phone calls in the middle of the night to the conversation lasted but a few seconds.
For 2 months I ignored him as best as I could. He was stalking me. Always calling always wanting to come over. I had my mom lying to him and telling him I was gone out with friends when I was actually home. My mother eventually got fed up and decided she would stop lying for me, and resorted to lying to me. 'Marianne is on the phone' HA I LIED. Again the begging begins, and again I went out with him to shut him up. This date went better the second time around.
Yet again another double date. Back to the same bar. Even to the same table for sitting and shooting pool. For some reason I was not as bothered by him but I was still not that interested. Jenna told me when the guys went to get something to drink that I don't have to date but at least be friends and hang out in double dates. To make her happy I oblidged. They came back and I decided to let the little kid in me out. Tyler, Jennas man, had set up a table and Jerry was prepping the table. We watched for a few minutes and then I became a little devil. Jerry layed his beer down on the table to take his turn, I quickly guzzled half of it and put it back. Then quickly took a drink of a my soda to mask the smell and the taste. (not to fond of beer). Jenna thought that was funny, I just gave her a crooked smile. 'Watch this'. He had lit up a smoke and after taking 2 drags placed it in the ashtray to take his turn. I grabbed the cigarette and smoked it until there were just two hits left maybe. Never smoked anything that fast before. After a few minutes of sitting there Jerry finally decided to take a drink and got this really baffled look on his face. HMMMMm I wonder why? He takes a swig of his beer and reached for his smoke and again that same baffled look. He must have a really bad memory. Lighting another smoke and sitting down I step around behind him and pretending like I am digging into my purse I bump and brush him. This continues through the night. The more I got close to him to steal something of his or play a prank I began to feel differently about him. But it had been MANY months since I had had a male play mate so I figured I was just horny. The night finally ends and he again drives Jenna home then me. I lived bout 20 miles away. At my house we talk and again he kisses me. My heart races. I actually held my breath. I new this would not be the last time I would see him.
A week passes it is Monday again. He picks me up first then gets Jenna. Off to the bar for Karaoke and pool. Surprisingly I am not bored with this place. For two weeks of February, on every Monday, we shoot pool and sing. One night he asks me to come back to his place after we drop off Jenna. I said sure I figured it was time to see how he lives. Arriving at his house I learn he lives with his grandmother, 3 sisters, and 1 brother, plus a father in law. Grandma is at work, and everyone else is asleep. We sit down on the couch and he puts in the VHS Grease. I love this movie. This became a Monday night ritual then his place. Two weeks of this, longer than I expected, he start doing the typical male thing and put the moves on me. I wouldn't let him go very far but it was fun seeing how persistent he was. Every Monday he would try again and I would let him get a little further. Never letting him touch anywhere he wanted to. untill one night.
We had finished watching grease and his back was aching. I told him to go into the bedroom and I would give him massage. Climbing onto the top bunk of the single size bunkbed I have him lay on his back. As I massage I make him remove his shirt and pants so that all he has is his shorts on. Being very relaxed I make a fuss about his underwear and tell him he needs to get rid of it for me to do any more rubbing........ NO MORE INFO USE YOUR IMAGINATION
My mom confronts me one day and tells me that I need to inform Jerry of the move to Missouri. I had not planned on telling him because I figured we were not that serious and he would not want to live together. Didn't help I had no other place to go. Moms are very persistent so I invited Jerry over to tell him the bad news. We went for a walk. After talking to him about it for an hour or so he decided he suddenly had to leave and walked me home. I put it together that he was pissed and this was the last time I would hear from him. Next day he returns back to my house and asks me to come and live with him. He had rented an apartment just down the street and didn't want me to leave. He was adamant about that. Took me surprise and I had ALOT to think about. My family was moving, my friends were enjoying there own lives, but I really didn't want to move. Being a military brat I had never lived anywhere for so long. I talked to my mom about it and she did her regular guilt trip. "I really want you to come with me but if you think you will be happy with him go ahead and stay here. I am not going to force you'. You know the typical semi guilt trip.
Well in mid march we moved in together. Boy did he get the whole package with me. I came with furniture. I could cook, clean, and I was employed. I was definitely sad to see my mom go but one thing I kept saying to myself was I am finally on my own I have to make it now. We lived there for 8 months. Would have lived there longer but we forced the complex to the break our lease because for the 8 months we were there the ac was broken. If you know Arizona and the summer you know how hot it can get nobody can sleep and not enough fans in the house can keep you cool.
We moved in with his grandmother next. Stayed there for 2 years. Two years to long. Alot of fighting went on and not only between Jerry and I. The whole house has got into fights. In this 3 bedroom 1 bathroom house there was, me jerry and 3 cats in one rooms, grandma and two little sisters, with 2 dogs, in another room, the third room consisted of a step father, another little sister and a little brother, in the living room on the couch was the possible father of the youngest sister, and on another couch there was his mother. ALOT of people in a little bitty place. Thank god we worked nights.
We married 6 months after moving in. Was kind of an unexpected thing. Jerry and I had gone to Best Buy for some price comparison and I had stopped at a lap top to write a message to Jerry. Yes I am a little romantic. The Message said. 'Whenever you are ready to get married I am more than willing.' To this day he still claims he is the one who wrote it and we were not at best buy. Whatever. Anywho.... I guess that was kind of my proposal cause next thing I new he was telling everyone that we were engaged. One night while talking to my mom we told her. Now THAT was a mistake. She began choosing the date, time, place and guest list. 'It had to be during these months and certain people are NOT invited. Well this pissed off Jerry. A couple weeks pass and out of the blue he decides we are going to Vegas to get married. We were not even out of bed yet. 'Call Jenna tell her to find a babysitter were going to get married in Vegas'. Yeah I was pumped but also a little upset I wanted to have a real wedding. Well Jenna couldn't find a babysitter for her son so we took him with us. We grabbed our best clothes checked the bank account and drove until the wee hours of the night. Stopping at Walmart to buy some 30 dollar rings. By the time we got there it was 11pm on April 21st. After getting the license and finding a chapel we got married. We were married in the Chapel by the courthouse on April 22nd 1999. We stayed in the Excalibur for a VERY nice price. Didn't tell them that Jenna was gonna be there too. Went up to the room, settled in and kicked Jenna out with about 20 dollars in nickels and quarters. The baby stayed in a doorless closet on the floor and we consummated our marriage in the jacuzzi and on the bed. When Jenna finally arrived she laid down with her son and we went to sleep. Knowing that Jerry had to be at work at 10pm that night the visit would be short. Early early morning the baby woke us women folk up and we left the room on a hunt for diapers. MY GOD those things are bloody expensive there. Waiting for Jerry to wake up we took the coins and took turns playing the slots. One watched the baby the other played. Around 11am we got Jerry up had some breakfast walked around the place for a couple hours. Ate again and headed home getting there just in time to eat again and go to work. We lived a year and a half with grandmother until a huge fight forced us to move out.
Our second apartment was a 2 bedroom, 2 bath. We moved Jeff the possible father of the youngest girl in with us. For two years we stayed there. It was ok living but it was a ways away from our work. This is where we started trying for a baby. We did the while fertility clinic thing and learned that his sperm count is so low that it is barely acknowledgeable and I don't produce enough eggs that are not even dropping when they are supposed to. But we kept trying. They were about to take a swimmer and insert it into one of my eggs but Jerry decided this was a huge financial burden and backed out. Cant do it if we don't got the sperm. I kept on trying.
Then we got our house. Jeff lived with us there too for a year but we needed some alone time. Since we had been married we had not lived alone. It was time. Our house was not much closer to work but definitely nicer. It was or is a 3 bedroom 2 bath 2 car garage with a backyard. Been here 3 years I am still trying to have a baby. I want a little girl really bad. Already got a named picked out Angelina Jeannita. AJ for short. If I ever do get pregnant and it is a boy Jerry gets to name it but I have already said no to certain names, Axl, William, or Bill. Anyone who knows him knows he is infactuated with Guns N Roses.


JESUS ok that is enough. All this writing and all I wrote about is how Jerry and I met. Guess my April first post went farther than I hoped for and he just got off the phone 15 minutes ago. Now am I a really fast typist or did he talk for a millennium.