Still not hot.

I posted in November about a dress I wore that I thought I looked fuckable in.  I was SOOOOO wrong. 

So last night I decided to try again.  2 weeks ago I bought new clothes.  I acquired a skirt and a blouse. Chose another top as the shirt did nothing to improve the outfit.  I wore it for us to go to the movies.  Thought I would dress up farther than jeans, step out of my comfort zone with a tank top and an over shirt.  So I bought a foot flowing skirt and a blouse. I did my hair and used all my makeup.  I splashed on perfume and donned jewelry. My bra was squeezing my ribs but the girls looked HUGE.  I was feeling confident.  I looked sexy.  Hubby came home after walking our son to school and I came out of the room decked out. Not even a smile from him. 

We left to run around town.  I took selfies so I could see if my face was still together.

  I was pleased.  My eyes were dark and sultry. The foundation was flawless.  I was loving myself. Still nothing from him. 

Stopped at best buy.  I reapplied my makeup and fixed my hair.  It was getting poofy. I enjoyed how I looked.  The skirt was long and had slits in it so my legs showed when I walked.  Went back out to walk around the store with him.  Still nothing from him. 

We went to the movies.  I was rocking this outfit. My tits were plush my stomach was covered.  My body was shaved.  I did another body and hair check. Adjusted wild hairs and applied lipstick for the 15th time.  Frustrated that my husband had not even said a word about my appearance, I tried a full body selfie in the bathroom, but the photo was foggy.  I asked a stranger if she would take my photo so I could get a full body shot.  Thankfully she did.

Not the best picture but I didn't want to waist her time. I posted the picture of the full body and a selfie,

  with the tag line " I thought I looked cute today'. Went in to watch the movie.  I slid my shoes off and put my feet up on the bar.  The skirt exposed my legs up to my thighs.  1 hour 48 min movie and he touched my knee for 5 min and held my hand.  I was broken.  Figured I would at least get a playful crotch grab,  kiss on the neck,  a compliment .  No dice.

Went to retrieve my car from the shop.  The wind was blowing and the skirt kept blowing around and up.  I thought maybe he would say something. Still nothing.  No groping,  no kiss, no ass tap. I started making this meme to express myself. 

We drove the vehicles home.  He continued to the school to get the baby and I went home. I asked if we were going back out and he said yes.  I walked in and tore all my,  what I thought was sexy,  off.  I was livid.  I pulled my hair up into a bun, took a selfie,

  then put on my baggy jeans and a tank with a baggy throw over shirt.

  Then I scrubbed the crap off of my face.  Removing the 4 layers of makeup I had on.  I turned around and cried on the bed til he called that he was on his way.  I rinsed my face and put on a smile. But needed one last all natural selfie.

  Makeup is a wonderful invention

I get into the truck thinking now he will say something.  Nothing was said.  From that point on all I could think about was what do I need to do to get him to notice me.  I give him sex whenever he wants it.  I never look like trailer trash in public, and I apply a little makeup,  mostly my eyes,  when we go out to eat.  I always put my hair down when we're out together.  He 'says'  he likes it down. He never mentions or touches it when it is down.  

So I'm done trying to look good for him.  I work too hard and put myself in pain to be attractive for him.  By his reactions I could have been wearing jeans and a t-shirt for all he cared.  Fuck I might as well have been wearing my pajamas and had bed head.  Would have got the same reaction either way.

He commented on my meme with "You looked good. Do I have to compliment you every time you do something?!"  My answer was " When I actually go out of my way dress up FUCK YES."

On my selfie/body picture many commented that I looked great.  His comment was the same from the meme.  A mutual friend replied" Yes you do! Is it really that difficult? Geesh! One little compliment goes a long way!" another comment I made was "We don't go on dates,  I don't go anywhere that requires me to look nice.  I'm not putting on makeup for walmart.  I only dress up once a year if that. So yeah I'm pissed off.  Nothing makes you feel uglier than trying to look your best and getting treated like you look like your still in pajamas and just woke up. Twice in a years time and both times I had bought an outfit to impress you. Both times I was treated like this.  Yes I'm scorned yes I'm mad.  I'm fucking hurt."  

So there it is.  Round 2 of you're not hot.  You would think he would have learned from the dress fiasco.

I hate when he takes my photo and I look like shit. I duck his photos. My hair will be doing the medusa thing, with dark circles under the eyes, and pale lips,  he has to take a picture.  But yet when I have put effort into my looks he doesn't give me a second glance. I'm not sure there was a first glance. 

So Saturday we had gone to a restaurant. He was taking pictures of everything. 

I had a little makeup on but wanted to punch it up so I excused myself to the restroom.I took these selfies in the bathroom so the work wasn't waisted in case he stopped taking my picture. 

Now I was  ready to take on his camera. Unfortunately he was done with me. He continued with our son and all the food on the table though. I got in a shot too.

As we were leaving I asked a server to take a family photo of us.

I was one again feeling good about myself with no comments.

We had gone out the next day and I wore the blouse I was to wear with the long skirt. It was cute and I had to do a selfie photo, and one boys shot.

I don't do selfies unless I have make up on and I think I look good. This one is very light make up. Cant rely on anyone else to tell me I look good. I don't dress up to look good for me or for others. I only do it for him so he is not embarrassed to be seen the way I look at home.  All for nothing is my new motto.